Ian Williams

The cause is the consequence. — Frantz Fanon 1 He would get pulled over whenever he tried to download Blonde. He would be searched for f-bombs but not for h-e- double-hockey sticks. He would get choke-held for wearing a hat in the hallway. He would be Tasered for balling his Whopper wrapper and leaving it on the floor of the streetcar. He would get shot in the back every time he incorrectly used MLA format in the essay on A Midsummer Night’s Dream. 2 He would take some E if he didn’t have to preach austerity. He would hire a tennis coach if the consultants he hired would actually fire the people to be fired. He would upgrade to the latest Galaxy if  millennials didn’t default on their student loans when he raised interest rates. He would get his shoes polished at the airport if the kiosk weren’t so far from the platinum members’ lounge. He would be placed on paid leave if  he raped the trainee from Dawson. Sexually assaulted. Allegedly.