The Crystal Lithium

The smell of snow, stinging in nostrils as the wind lifts it from a beach Eve-shuttering, mixed with sand, or when snow lies under the street lamps and on all And the air is emptied to an uplifting gassiness That turns lungs to winter waterwings, buoying, and the bright white night Freezes in sight a lapse of waves, balsamic, salty, unexpected: Hours after swimming, sitting thinking biting at a hangnail And the taste of the—to your eyes—invisible crystals irradiates the world “The sea is salt” “And so am I” “Don’t bite your nails” and the metal flavor of a nail—are these brads?— Taken with a slight spitting motion from between teeth and whanged into place (Boards and sawdust) and the nail set is ridged with cold Permanently as marble, always degrees cooler than the rooms of air it lies in Felt as you lay your cheek upon the counter on which sits a blue-banded cup A counter of condensed wintry exhalations glittering infinitesimally A promise, late on a broiling day in late September, of the cold kiss Of marble sheets to one who goes barefoot quickly in the snow and early Only so far as the ash can—bang, dump—and back and slams the door: Too cold to get up though at the edges of the blinds the sky Shows blue as flames that break on a red sea in which black coals float: Pebbles in a pocket embed the seam with grains of sand Which, as they will, have found their way into a pattern between foot and bedfoot “A place for everything and everything in its place” how wasteful, how wrong It seems when snow in fat, hand-stuffed flakes falls slow and steady in the sea “Now you see it, now you don’t” the waves growl as they grind ashore and roll out At your feet (in boots) a Christmas tree naked of needles Still wound with swags of tarnishing tinsel, faintly alarming as the thought Of damp electricity or sluggish lightning and for your health desiring pains The wind awards: Chapped Lips: on which to rub Time’s latest acquisition Tinned, dowel shaped and inappropriately flavored sheep wool fat A greasy sense-eclipsing fog “I can’t see Without my glasses” “You certainly can’t see with them all steamed up Like that. Pull over, park and wipe them off.” The thunder of a summer’s day Rolls down the shimmering blacktop and mowed grass juice thickens the air Like “Stir until it coats the spoon, remove from heat, let cool and chill” Like this, graying up for more snow, maybe, in which a small flock Of—sparrows?—small, anyway, dust-kitty-colored birds fly up On a dotted diagonal and there, ah, is the answer: Starlings, bullies of birdland, lousing up The pecking order, respecters of no rights (what bird is) unloved (oh?) Not so likeable as some: that’s temperate enough and the temperature Drops to rise to snowability of a softness even in its scent of roses Made of untinted butter frosting: Happy Name Day, Blue Jay, staggering On slow-up wings into the shrunk into itself from cold forsythia snarl And above these thoughts there waves another tangle but one parched with heat And not with cold although the heat is on because of cold settled all About as though, swimming under water, in clearly fishy water, you Inhaled and found one could and live and also found you altogether Did not like it, January, laid out on a bed of ice, disgorging February, shaped like a flounder, and March with her steel head pocketbook, And April, goofy and under-dressed and with a loud laugh, and May Who will of course be voted Miss Best Liked (she expects it), And June, with a toothpaste smile, fresh from her flea bath, and gross July, Flexing itself, and steamy August, with thighs and eyes to match, and September Diving into blue October, dour November, and deadly dull December which now And then with a surprised blank look produces from its hand the ace of trumps Or sets within the ice white hairline of a new moon the gibbous rest: Global, blue, Columbian, a blue dull definite and thin as the first day Of February when, in the steamed and freezing capital cash built Without a plan to be its own best monument its skyline set in stacks Like poker chips (signed “Autodidact”), at the crux of a view there crosses A flatcar-trailer piled with five of the cheaper sort of yachts, tarpaulined, Plus one youth in purple pants, a maid in her uniform and an “It’s not real Anything” Cossack hat and coat, a bus one-quarter full of strangers and The other familiar fixings of lengthening short days: “He’s outgrown them Before you can turn around” and see behind you the landscape of the past Where beached boats bask and terraced cliffs are hung with oranges Among dark star-gleaming leaves, and, descending the dizzying rough stairs Littered with goat turd beads—such packaging—you—he—she— One—someone—stops to break off a bit of myrtle and recite all the lines Of Goethe that come back, and those in French, “Connais-tu... ?” the air Fills with chalk dust from banged erasers, behind the February dunes Ice boats speed and among the reeds there winds a little frozen stream Where kids in kapok ice-skate and play at Secret City as the sun Sets before dinner, the snow on fields turns pink and under the hatched ice The water slides darkly and over it a never before seen liquefaction of the sun In a chemical yellow greener than sulphur a flash of petroleum by-product Unbelievable, unwanted and as lovely as though someone you knew all your life Said the one inconceivable thing and then went on washing dishes: the sky Flows with impersonal passion and loosening jet trails (eyes tearing from the cold) And on the beach, between foam frozen in a thick scalloped edging so like Weird cheek-mottling pillowcase embroidery, on the water-darkened sand the waves Keep free of frost, a gull strangles on a length of nylon fishline and the dog Trots proudly off, tail held high, to bury a future dinner among cut grass on a dune: The ice boats furl their sails and all pile into cars and go off to the super market Its inviting foods and cleansers sold under tunes with sealed in memory-flavor “Hot House Rhubarb” “White Rock Girl” “Citrus Futures” “Cheap Bitter Beans” and In its parking lot vast as the kiss to which is made the most complete surrender In a setting of leaves, backs of stores, a house on a rise admired for being Somewhat older than some others (prettier, too?) a man in a white apron embraces a car Briefly in the cold with his eyes as one might hug oneself for warmth for love —What a paint job, smooth as an eggplant; what a meaty chest, smooth as an eggplant —Is it too much to ask your car to understand you? the converse isn’t and the sky Maps out new roads so that, driving at right angles to the wind, clouds in ranks Contrive in diminishing perspective a part of a picture postcard of a painting Over oak scrub where a filling station has: gas, a locked toilet (to keep dirt in) A busted soda pop machine, no maps and “I couldn’t tell you thet” so The sky empties itself to a color, there, where yesterday’s puddle Offers its hospitality to people-trash and nature-trash in tans and silvers And black grit like that in corners of a room in this or that cheap dump Where the ceiling light burns night and day and we stare at or into each Other’s eyes in hope the other reads there what he reads: snow, wind Lifted; black water, slashed with white; and that which is, which is beyond Happiness or love or mixed with them or more than they or less, unchanging change, “Look,” the ocean said (it was tumbled, like our sheets), “look in my eyes”